This experience started out as a dream, but turned into a lucid experience along the way. As the dream unfolded, I could see the effort my egos (something I learned to observe from Belsebuub’s works) were putting into making sure I remained asleep in that dream state.
It all started with an innocent scenario. In the dream, I was with friends, walking through a 2 bedroom apartment they were looking to purchase near the university where their daughter was studying.
The person showing them through was informing them of the layout and highlighting some of the features of the apartment. I walked around with them, but was more in the background, simply there with them.
The real estate agent mentioned that it was a 2 bedroom apartment. In that instant I began to question what he had said “this is a 2 bedroom apartment?“, “it looks rather small“, “where is the second bedroom?” and so on…
As I questioned the layout of the apartment, and moved around it looking for this second bedroom, I started to open up a door which led into a lounge room. It seemed to come off the kitchen area. I walked into the lounge area looking for more doors as this would mean another room is behind it. I came across a door, as I grabbed its handle, it became a bifold door.
I paused briefly, slightly baffled by this instant ‘change’, which caught my attention and brought on a slight lucidity. I proceeded to open this door, but it suddenly became a 4 panel door. The dream scene kept changing, as though there was intent to keep me in a confused dream state, stopping me from becoming more lucid.
As I continued to open this door I expected to find a room behind it. This was not the case. There was a wall behind it, not a room. This only helped me to become more lucid as the whole scene struck me as ‘odd’. I could feel myself slowly lifting out of the dream state.
It seems the efforts to keep me locked into this dream state intensified also. As my lucidity increased, reinforcements were brought in. The real estate agent noticed my ‘lucidity’ and came over to speak to me, trying to convince me that the apartment was designed that way on purpose, to give the illusion of being a bigger space, and that the 2nd bedroom was further along.
I could feel this heavy (almost hypnotic) energy creep into my lucid state as he spoke to me, trying to make me drift back into a sleep mode. I could sense an intensified effort to make me enter and continue to remain in the dream state again.
In my attempts to gain more clarity, I could feel the hypnotic effect lifting though and a sense of lucidity coming over me. Unfortunately, I could also feel this ego (the internal state trying to pull me deeper into dreaming) battle against my own will, to keep me in this slumber so it can carry on as it pleased.
Anyway, I tried to challenge this ego as best I could. I started to say “I know what’s going on, this is a dream, I am in a dream, I am trying to wake up in this dream and you are trying to stop that from happening.” This figure froze, as though I had just called his ‘bluff’ and he was dumbfounded. I continued to say “I know I am dreaming, I am not falling for this, I am in the astral.”
I shifted my focus from my head (where I felt all this intense energy swarming), down to my heart, so that I could remain calm and connected to the lucid feeling. I actually ended up waking up in my physical body as the dichotomy brought more tension into my head and I could not remain in the astral. Those ego intentions were stronger than my intent or Will in this instant.
Hi Dimi,
I can relate to grappling with an ego on the verge of lucidity. I also had experiences like this, and most recently in daily life when I was making efforts to be aware and do what I felt was needed vs. what I was interested in.
I noticed that when I give in to the interest (usually with the intention to come soon be back to the task at hand) I easily get engrossed in the interest and forget about what I needed to do in the first place. On the other hand, pursuing what I needed in the first place gives a degree of strength at accomplishing something, and sometimes brings other benefits.
Another recent experience with a similar kind of feeling was when I was not sure what to do regarding a particular situation. As it sometimes happens in such cases, I make every effort to find a loophole that would enable me to do what I wanted. However, after struggling with it for some time and getting clarifications on all the question points I realized there was no loophole and had to make a change. Although the change brought about some difficulties, it also opened up new opportunities that I could in no way foresee. The thing that struck with me is a memory of this struggle, with an effort to do what’s right.
All the best and thanks for sharing your experience.
This is a very interesting experience Dimi, as it shows how aware of what they are doing our egos (with a part of our consciousness locked in them) are, and how their aim really is AGAINST our clarity and awakening. In an encounter with an ego I had some time ago in the astral, I also felt a negative intention towards me, so it was interesting for me to read how this “agent” in your experience was trying his best to keep you locked in the internal sleep.
Speaking about external influences, I noticed there are also negative entities that do something similar, kind of watching us and as soon as we show the signs of becoming lucid and aware of what is going on, they spring into action. In your case, it seems like there wasn’t any direct external negative intervention, and if your feeling was more that they were a part of you, then that’s probably true.
Thank you for sharing this special encounter Dimi, I think the mental egos in particular can be very heavy and blurring, so great job on unmasking them! Your experience actually inspired me to watch for these on the verge of falling asleep too, and as a consequence, I found myself wrestling with an ego in a clear dream afterwards. I think things can get very interesting once we realise what is actually going on…
What a nice reminder that we are always tempted to stay in a slumber from our internal states (egos). These sneaky situations blindfold the possibility of having a lucid astral experience. Seems that there are always reinforcements to make the sleepy haze continue during sleep time.
This experience reminds me of the importance of questioning in each moment of the day, so the astral experiences can become more of a reality.
Thanks for sharing Dimi…
That’s a good reminder about questioning during the day Sof, excelent point.
This is an interesting account of your battle to stay lucid Dimi. The part about the guy becoming dumbfounded when you called his bluff made me chuckle. But it also had a serious point to it, as deception is a favourite trick of the egos and negative entitities, so when their cover is blown, they are exposed for what they are.
Those are some very interesting observations, Dimi. I have also had experiences in the astral where a being I interact with, although perhaps not malevolent, has seemed to come from my own subconscious, trying to make me fall into a dream state. I’m still not sure what to make of those cases, but hearing your take on it is helpful.
It’s certainly true that that resistance is present in daily life. It’s quite noticeable how the egos resist our staying in awareness and how they fight to fascinate us with the things of the world if we are aware…
Thanks for sharing this!
Hi Mike, I have spent a bit of time trying to decipher or discern the numerous sensations that come from within, but not from the head space, from an internal sphere that seems to reside in the body, around the heart centre. In my case, it seems to speak/communicate to me, alerting me to my surroundings and also helping me to keep lucid.
Then there are those sensations that crowd around the head space, becoming domineering and suppressive almost, with the intent to keep projections and dream scenes unfolding, therefore locking me into a sleep state. These seem to be my own inner nature churning away while my body sleeps.
It is a pity that I did get somewhat caught up in this dream and did not think to use a recitation to help me remain clear or a conjuration to help me clear the air (so to speak).
Hi Dimi,
What an important experience, I’d like to have this conclusion stay with me so I don’t forget it as I usually do.
The situation where you opened the door to find a wall behind reminded me a bit of a scene from the Matrix movie 🙂
Your experience reminds me of a time when I was trying to understand this ‘sleepiness/hypnotic effect’ of the egos. On one occasion I had to do some computer work but had some problems with my internet at home, so I went to work at some friend’s house. I was sitting there without much distractions and trying not to make too much noise as it was early in the morning.
As I was working I noticed how I was beginning to feel more and more sleepy albeit trying to keep my focus and work. At first I thought I was just tired, but then I paid attention to that tiredness and it actually felt different to normal physical and psychological tiredness. It’s hard to describe it, it was a bit like this pulling heaviness in my mind. As soon as I realized this wasn’t just me being tired I started praying that it would be eliminated from me. It was difficult to keep my focus but after a few minutes I noticed how my state started feeling lighter and I wasn’t sleepy any more. I got up and did some light stretches and was able to continue my work in a focused way.
Later that day I repeated that prayer session as again I started feeling this mental heaviness/sleepiness as I was trying to meditate and had the same positive result. It showed how important it is to look into these states and really see how you feel about them because sometimes it’s not what it seems like.
Maybe there’s something even deeper with this as you find references of that detrimantal type of ‘sleep’ in perception in ancient texts and also as Belsebuub puts it: “The sleep of consciousness that weighs heavily upon the human race”.
Hi Pavlin, it is so so true – there is this internal resistance from our own inner nature to steer us away from keeping a spiritual focus in our day.
I too have noticed hypnotic states through out my day, lulling me into a daydream state and chewing away at my ‘energy’ levels, making me feel fatigued and tired, lethargic at worst..! I have slowly come to realise how harmful this lull or hypnotic effect is to my psyche (as Belsebuub alerts us to); how it makes me forget to be aware, to be observant of my internal and external surroundings.
Unfortunately, I have egos that are tricky, that know my weak points and will use them against me. My task is to uncover them and do this with Divine Intervention!
Hi Pavlin
I had very similar experience of that state you describe recently (plus many before as well :)) as I was about to wash dishes. I began to feel this tired ‘feeling’ and then it moved to be a sleepy ‘feeling’ which normally would lead me to want to lie down and have a rest, but this time I caught a sense of of the ego state behind these feelings and its intentions. That’s when I knew that they were trying to take me out of the fight to be consciously awake, so that during the sleep these feelings would manifest in dreams in a greater capacity., and cause me to feel emotionally low. As soon as I caught wind of this underlying intention behind this tired state, the whole tired feeling completely disappeared and I felt more alert than I had been before the feeling had started.
I think what helped me was the knowledge of my own consciousness pushing at that time, past experiences of seeing the outcome of the ‘tired feelings’, and observing that inner state as it happened (and not in any perfect way but enough to see this as it was taking place). I felt that I had caught the beginning of what was about to be the onset of lower emotions, a bit like pulling out a weed that has just sprung up from the ground where the root is weak and easy to pull out.
It’s interesting how you managed to regain that alertness Layla. Thanks for sharing your experience.
Thanks for bringing up this issue with lucidity during dreams Dimi.
I liked reading your story how this was illustrated there.
In a similar case I remember how difficult was for me to keep my eyes open in the astral, that I was trying to hold with my fingers the eyelid open 🙂
That’s funny Fotis! 🙂
Hi Fotis, I too have had those experiences where my eye lids seem too heavy to stay open (while I am in the Astral trying to remain lucid and aware) to the point of being distracted by it, and having to keep at least one eye open while the other closes in an attempt to be able to see my surroundings…! Such experiences seem to make out that it is more important to be able to see what is going around me, placing more emphasis on the external aspect unfolding and perhaps acting as a distraction from noticing the internal distraction going on, that is, ego states that are clouding the experience, stopping it from becoming a more lucid and conscious one. So, I can relate to your insights on this too!
That’s a new one for me Fotis, does it work ? 🙂
no really…
maybe this one…
https://i1.wp.com/www.bluemax.me/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Tom-Jerry-Sleepy-Eyes.jpg
…joking 🙂
LOL!